I have kept a diary/journal since January 1999. I do not journal regularly anymore because I found that it wasn’t serving me as it once had. I will still sit down to write myself back around if I’m finding myself feeling a bit lost. (Ha! Finding myself lost.) But, generally, I now want to focus most of my writing energy to adding value to the world, via this blog and my fiction, instead of keeping a private log.
Because I’ve kept a journal for such a huge part of my life, I feel like it is a part of who I am. I journaled regularly for 15 out of my 28 years. I’ve filled nearly 70 blank books. I’ve recorded over 13,000 pages. Most of the books I read as a child, and a whole bunch after childhood, are epistolary novels. I just love, love, love the stream-of-consciousness, daily format, and intimacy of the style.
So I want to try to bring it over to this blog. I was inspired to start this blog while reading other minimalism blogs. A lot of those blogs are written as instructional and inspirational essays. And since I got huge value from them, I wanted to emulate them. But they are already serving that purpose. Perhaps my purpose is to bring a different view of the process and lifestyle (of minimalism and writing) to the internet. Maybe a very personal, diary-style one. And after 15 years of practice, I’d hope I’d be pretty good at it by now.
Maybe my voice will stand out while writing more freeform. Maybe I’ll discover some new things while letting my mind wander and the words flow. Also, I hate thinking of titles and sticking to specific topics. My life and thoughts are more interwoven than that. I think of the same things from day to day, and of different things over time. I’m not enough of an expert to spit out entire, complete, final essays. I’m still learning. I’ve been learning for the last 28 years and suspect I will be continuing to learn for the next 28 and the 28 after that…
Oh, yeah. This feels good.
Perhaps I’ll hate some of these essays if/when I look back on them in a few years. I know I sure hated some of my old diary entries that I went back and read. But whatevs. I was there then, I am here now, and I will be wherever sometime. I’ll warn you, sometimes I’ll get lost in my own thought process and maybe it’ll seem a bit circular. Like that last sentence. But, damn, what a good sentence, right? That shit’s profound.
Or maybe it’s not. I’ll write what I gotta get out. You take what you need to get.